Wednesday, November 12, 2008

Cold cold Wednesday.. 121108


This wednesday seem so cold.. not much sms, not much calls.. Alanis baby called me today, the moment she talk to me, its moves my heart… i felt that im a bad mum.. Times turns fast, she is going to graduate frm her playgroup.. i did not fetch them last week which i suppose too.. i just felt tired, motionless.. do not want to be interrupt.. but in mind they were always in my heart.. yet its does not move me to go over…

Honestly, i miss them calling me, miss them running to the door step, miss them lent on me..

SORRY IS WHAT MUMMY CAN SAY…


I rem the time i register her to skl.. i brought her with me to and to let her run around the classroom. Her teacher try talking to her but she kept slient, just like her dad, IDENTICALLY.. which seldom like to talk to stranger.. When i heard my maid say that teacher require parent to turn up.. the thots came to me and remind me, hey annie, u are a mummy.. can u still rem that.. haiz.. i recalled how my mum bringing us to skl and how she brought us up.. It’s tough with four kids… Finacially and mentally.. how do u do it, MUMMY??


Talking about my personal life, i really did shit this year… Its a hard year.. terribly shit… wat to do.. its wat i choose to do… and i cant look back.. thinking back, im really a sicko.. But i met alot of ppls(Different culture, different country, different sex,different attitube,different thinking), so much and its countless, can say every mth, my phonebook is updated with different names and i wonder how do i identify who is who(the way i did its, where i get to know them, geez) … I just like friends, love making new friends…. Loves party, loves drinking, loves to let go my hair and party.., importanly.. just enjoy and to forget all the freaking stuffs in life for the very moment..

DRINK, DRANK, DRUNK…


Well, yesterday 3118 called me… earlier on i was the one who called.. i just put in my effort to contact thou i know 3118 just freaking busy.. my cellphone just stop receiving text msg and call frm 3118.. Who cares, i just ring up.. but its was ended saying, Sorry, am busy now.. call you back later.. after hearing, i replied.. and say alritey, its ok.. and didn expect a call back … But things turns while the earth moves every second, called me up at 1am plus which i aledi slept, was in a blur mood when i pick up the call.. i still ask who is it and 3118 say it ah xxx..( IT WAS 3118 WHO CALLED ME, U KNOW).. the conversation was a short one, the feeling talking was so comfortable yet cold.. Told me just too busy… i replied i could not get use to it as we were so close yet so far few days back we contacted…. =(
Told me life is stressful and not smooth now.. Gotta do something in life as Felt that is far behind time.. i replied saying i do understand and go ahead that gotta do… well, after that call… i felt the heart is warm compare to the coldness i had previously… And now honestly i understand of the feeling LET GO.. its seem hard but i did it slowly.. i stop texting anymore, i wont leave offline message anymore and dun even think think of it anymore.. i hope i can do it so that i dun feel so shitty in heart.. maybe its not mine at all.. should it be a passer-by in life… i guess so… what else can i expect when u dun belong to people’s heart..

As this sentence goes…

LET NATURE TAKE ITS BLOODY COURSE…

its just a bull shit sentence..


What do u think.. I really do not know…


AMK J text me asking ”Halo.. Ha.. My Frez how r u?” in the evening while i was on my way back home… the moment i saw the sms.. i just wanted to reply back but i hold back.. i did not reply as i rem how my friend told me to handle this kinda situtation. I text him back say around an hr and more later.. saying am good.. This works as he replied why i took so long to reply back… I mean if he does not care.. he wont be bother to ask why i take so long to reply.. bloody foolz.. I told him im playing games and doing housework which is a lie.. i just dun want to tell him the truth that im am suffering.. but real fact is that im not at all..

Anyway, its past…
I nv give a damn to it anymore…
Good nite pals.. Hugz


Summerise sign off @ 2214=)

this heart of mine was broken at 8:41 PM
0 people tried to mend this shattered heart

Summerise FINALLY have a bloggie

Finally, i have willingly to figure out how to have my own blog… Really need a space to write my own feeling, my say, my ups and down daily.. Catch up again then.. Missing him… Sighz…

this heart of mine was broken at 8:35 PM
0 people tried to mend this shattered heart

Myself & I

  • Some words about yourself
  • Maybe your age
  • But don't forget your name
  • It ain't secret anymore

Those Days


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